The Troll

That slideshow is a treasure trove, dug up by Fort Fiends' very own Indiana Jones, TCD! This: I've heard talk that the old fishing/hunting lodge was located at the area that is now the Settlement, close to the Settlement Trading Post. If so, if what's pictured above is that lodge, the Lawnmower Tree is nearby. I heard a rumor that Walt and Roy liked the lodge building so much that they considered including it in Fort Wilderness. And now I'm going to go out on a limb and contribute to the discussion with a Troll RantTM about this photo: Remember, you can't get mad at me, report me

Your book looks well-written, well-researched, and well-organized. Have you considered a print version?

OK, I have a suggestion for the next TDD Trip Report. Hear me out. Don't say no until you've pondered it good. Just consider it. I think you should do a TCD Does the Fort Solo report. OK, do not say no yet. You haven't heard me out. I know it would be sorta lonely...well, very lonely, without your girls, but just consider... You could do a long weekend and just focus on a TCD Tours the Fort perspective. You could go into excruciating detail about everything you see and find. Since you'd be doing it solo, you could write the report on-the-fly, while you're there, and us Fort Fie

Bravo. Outstanding report, as always. This one was extra good.

Wow! Already 16,000+ views, Andrew. This is shaping up into an epic trip report!

Yep. That's me. No respect! But I agree -- a Pirate Island would make a mint.

Ummmm...hello?

Yes, the Empire clearly needs a PT program (that's physical training for you non-military folks) and they need to learn how to march in step! And one hair to split with Devores on his point about added scenes. He is mostly correct, but not entirely. There were numerous new scenes -- or, well, shots -- added that were not originally filmed in the 70s or 80s. For example, the shot of the wampa eating the tauntaun in his cave is totally new. It is not the footage originally shot in the 70s. In ROTJ there is a collection of cheesy shots of reveling people all across the Empire celebrating the de

Restaurant recommendations: Pandora's is good. And if you want pizza, Pizza by the Sea is excellent.

Mmmm...BBQ macaw. Dibs on the white meat.

Sorry, I forgot I wanted to answer these questions. Understand, I am a purist, so these are purist answers. 1. Where is earth? Is it ever even mentioned A galaxy far, far away. Perhaps doesn't even exist yet. That is, perhaps the planet known as "earth" has not even formed yet. Star Wars happened "a long time ago." 2. Who paid for all that stuff they have? Seriously, where did the money come from for the Death Star, and who funded the Rebels? All those space ships and stuff can't be cheap. It depends on which side you're asking about. The Empire is very much like the Nazis -- they

Great report, Devores. Interesting. So...guests pay $95 park admission to do a scavenger hunt? Hmm... But you know, this is exactly what Discovery Island coulda/shoulda been. And I guess still could.

Great mention of the light vents. I had forgotten about those. Imagine, someone thought up the idea to put lights in vents in rocks. BTW, I've said this before many times, but thank you, Andrew, for writing these reports. Mrs. Troll and I enjoy them tremendously.

Yes, indeed, Seaside and Topsail are just a hop, skip, and a jump away from the Troll Cave. We spend lots and lots of time camping at Topsail. But like it BETTER than the Fort? I don't know about that, now. The Topsail campground is the #2 campground in the US, in my book. It's kind of like a Fort away from Fort, to me. Ordinarily, Mrs. Troll and I would take you up on this offer, but I'm afraid Mrs. Troll is out of town on business right now. Next time!

River Country! Hurry up, TDD!

Ahhh...amazing. Did you shoot that picture of the Pioneer Hall under construction?

Ahem. As a former Star Wars junkie, may I point out that Greedo did not speak English. Jawas did not speak English. The Sand People did not speak English. Ewoks did not speak English. Jabba did not speak English. The Imperial spy did not speak English. Nien Nunb did not speak English. Everyone understands English, however. Oddly. And almost everyone understands the foreign languages spoken to them.

You must be using something like this:

All right, I've got to know: What is the deal with these old photos? How are they such incredibly high quality and new-looking? These old pictures look so new it's haunting, like they don't seem real. How are you doing this? Are you using some software that fixes them or are you transferring old slide images to digital or what?! This is incredible! Those construction pictures of the Fort look like they were taken literally yesterday. Like I said, it's haunting. There's no other word I can think of for it.

This is an excellent trip report! Very entertaining! More, please!

Amen! Honestly, I don't mean to offend anyone here on this board, but this is just such a bizarre fad to me. It's almost like a mass hysteria. If the tattoo were temporary -- if you could wear it for as long as you like and then easily remove it -- I could easily understand it. But it's permanent. It's going to be on your body when you're laid to rest in your casket. It's like wearing a really, really loud outfit from the 80s every single day for the rest of your life. Surely, folks must realize the tattoos will eventually go out of style, yes?

Wow. Does this bring back memories. I just about drowned off the side of this floating platform at the age of about 5. The cannon didn't last long. Just a few years in the beginning, if memory serves me right. But yes, this is where the cannon was.

This is the end Beautiful friend This is the end My only friend, the end... We loved the time we spent with you To share a song and a laugh or two May your pleasures be many Your troubles be few... Yes, folks, this is the end. The end of another Troll Trip Report. It's a sad thing. Every time a Fort trip comes to its end, on the very last day, I sink into a sick, depressed state. It's awful. The end of a Troll Trip Report isn't quite as bad, but it's like that. So why does this report have to come to an end? Because I'm out of pictures, that's why. From demon rubber hoses to the Rock

You may be on to something... Yes, we love those dogs. And I love my hammock! Boys and girls? Um, I'm a troll, remember? So I'll go ahead and take the lump of coal. Hey, you know one job that's more prestigious than Santa Claus impersonators? Elvis impersonators. I bet there's a convention you go to every year, isn't there? Ha ha...just kidding. Thanks for reading along! Ahhh...to be younger.

Time for more! You know, sadly, we're nearing the end of this report. So as we wind down, let's take a look at a quick list of things the Troll does not like, shall we? DVCsThe "Richard Petty Loud Car Experience"It's a Small WorldPeople who blatantly flout rules...you know, like the rule about keeping your dogs on leashesSoarin'Stitches' "Great" EscapeThe four crappy loops with no wilderness in themThe Tree of LifeThe Swiss Family Robinson TreehouseThe Tiki RoomThe loud, annoying racetrack thing at MK...whatever it's calledThe Country BearsKids Now let's take a look at some things the Tro